Supporting Families Through Incurable Cancer: The Ruth Strauss Foundation’s Mission | Guest Post

02 April 2025 — jessica-bailey

Since 2019, the Ruth Strauss Foundation has been supporting families facing the death of a parent to cancer by providing emotional support and funding research. In this guest blog, they tell us more about why the Foundation was set up, the types of support available to families, and their work in advocacy and raising awareness of non-smoking lung cancer.

When a parent receives an incurable cancer diagnosis, it turns life upside down – especially for families with young children. Navigating conversations about cancer and preparing for the future can feel overwhelming. The Ruth Strauss Foundation exists to ensure that no family faces this journey alone, providing essential emotional support, practical guidance, and a compassionate community.

Through our Family Support Services we provide peer support and advocacy to help parents and children manage incurable cancer diagnoses and anticipatory grief while creating meaningful memories together.

Who We Are: The Ruth Strauss Foundation

The Ruth Strauss Foundation is named after Ruth (pictured above), a mother of two young boys, who received the devastating news in 2018 that her lung cancer – despite being a non-smoker – was incurable. She knew she needed to prepare her family for life without her. However, finding support to help prepare her boys was difficult. Determined to change this, she set out a vision to ensure that no family would face this situation without access to professional support.

In her memory, her husband, Sir Andrew Strauss, launched the Ruth Strauss Foundation to:

· Provide emotional support for families facing the challenges of incurable cancer.

· Advocate for greater awareness and research into non-smoking lung cancer.

Understanding Anticipatory Grief and Pre-Bereavement

Anticipatory grief is the complex mix of emotions experienced before the death of a loved one. It encompasses feelings of sadness, anxiety, frustration, guilt, and also moments of joy as families cherish their time together. For parents diagnosed with an incurable cancer, discussing incurable illness and death with their children can be one of the most challenging conversations they will ever have.

Pre-bereavement support is crucial in helping families navigate these emotions, ensuring that children feel supported and prepared for the future. The Ruth Strauss Foundation provides families with the resources, counselling, and guidance needed to manage these difficult conversations.

“I had many unanswered questions – what should I be thinking about? How should I be approaching it? What does it look like when one of the parents is going to die? The Ruth Strauss Foundation gave us the tools and confidence to have difficult conversations and prepare as best as we could. When it was time to talk to our eldest about Matthew’s prognosis, we used a template that balanced clarity, facts, and emotion. While it was one of the hardest conversations we’ve ever had, it went as well as it could have.” – Nina sought support from the Ruth Strauss Foundation when her husband, Matthew, was diagnosed with stage 4 bile duct cancer.

What Services Do We Offer?

The Ruth Strauss Foundation offers a comprehensive Family Support Service designed to help families facing an incurable cancer diagnosis. Our services include:

1. Guidance and Support

We offer practical guidance, information, and reassurance to help parents find the words to share news and updates about an incurable cancer diagnosis with their children.

2. One-to-One Counselling for Parents

For those seeking extra support, we offer one-to-one counselling with trained specialists, providing emotional and psychological support to help parents navigate the challenges of living with incurable cancer.

3. Peer Support Groups

We provide separate peer support group sessions for parents and teenagers, allowing them to connect with others facing similar challenges and receive guidance from a professionally trained facilitator.

4. Resources for Families

We offer a range of free materials designed to guide families through anticipatory grief, including conversation templates, activity ideas, and coping strategies.

“The advice I got from the Ruth Strauss Foundation was extremely helpful. Without it, my son wouldn’t have been able to articulate his feelings, and instead, I knew what to do and we grew closer. It’s that really practical advice and life-changing support that’s been invaluable.”  – Jim, father of Archie & Louis. After his wife, Laura, was diagnosed with incurable bowel cancer, the Ruth Strauss Foundation provided them with expert guidance on how to prepare their young children for what lay ahead.

5. Training for Healthcare Professionals

Our training programme, No Conversation Too Tough, equips healthcare professionals with the skills, knowledge and confidence to support parents with an incurable cancer diagnosis to have challenging conversations with their children about death and dying.

“The training I did with the Ruth Strauss Foundation has been pivotal to enhancing what we know is the right thing to do and really brought it to the forefront of our clinical practice.” – Victoria Castle, Breast Cancer Clinical Nurse Specialist

6. Awareness and Advocacy

We champion greater awareness of non-smoking lung cancer and advocate for increased research into early diagnosis and treatment.

Who Uses Our Services?

We offer support to families in the UK affected by a parent’s incurable cancer, helping parents navigate conversations with their children about illness and grief. Teenagers can join peer support groups, providing them with a space to connect with others facing similar experiences. Parents can also access peer support groups, offering them guidance and connection. We also provide training for healthcare professionals to better support these families.

The Most Rewarding Part of Our Work

One of the most fulfilling aspects of our work is witnessing the difference pre-bereavement support makes in the lives of families. By equipping parents with the tools to have open and honest conversations with their children, we see how it helps families find comfort and strength.

“I think my dad would be quite pleased that I’m going out to talk about it to other people, especially if this goes on to help other kids who see this and take inspiration.” – Henry, who lost his father to brain cancer at age 17, speaking to Sky Sports during the 2024 #RedforRuth event at Lord’s, raising awareness for the Ruth Strauss Foundation.

For Those Considering Reaching Out

If you or someone you know is facing an incurable cancer diagnosis and feeling uncertain about seeking support, know that reaching out can provide the guidance and comfort you need.

Many parents fear discussing death with their children, but our experienced team is here to help make these conversations easier. You can learn more about our support here.

“Pre-bereavement support is incredibly important. When someone has a terminal illness diagnosis, it’s unbelievably disruptive to everyone, it’s like a bomb going off in your family.” – Ellen, mother of Henry and Alex. When her husband, Alan, was diagnosed with a brain tumour, the Ruth Strauss Foundation provided them with pre-bereavement guidance and support sessions to help navigate difficult conversations with their children. Her son also attended peer support groups for teenagers.

Join Us in Making a Difference

The Ruth Strauss Foundation is committed to ensuring that no family facing an incurable cancer diagnosis is alone. Whether you want to fundraise, volunteer, donate, or help spread awareness, there are many ways to support our mission:

· Fundraise by taking part in events like our annual #RedforRuth campaign or host your own event to support families facing the bereavement of a parent.

· Volunteer and support our work across the UK – make friends, develop new skills, and help raise awareness and vital funds.

· Donate to help us continue our vital work.

· Spread awareness by sharing our resources and following us on Instagram and Facebook.

“I had so much guidance from my private sessions with the Ruth Strauss Foundation, even just telling me ‘You’re doing a great job’ – allowed me to do my best. I’ll be forever grateful. I would always encourage people to reach out as soon as they can.” – Harriet, mother of Thomas & Lulu, who sought support from the Foundation after her husband, Rob, was diagnosed with incurable lung cancer. Rob, a dedicated RAF pilot, was passionate about helping others and remained a source of strength for his family throughout his illness.

You can find the support you and your family and loved ones need by visiting the Ruth Strauss Foundation.